Gonna Love Myself

Hello internet junkies, it's been a while! Last time I posted it was Thanksgiving and now it's February. Time flew by! In the past I always hated February. In fact, I loathed it. During high school it seemed that a lot of bad things happened to me in this month. But this winter I've never been more eager for it. Winter is hard for me. Everything is dark and cold no matter where you are and sadness comes too easy for me. I've always hated winter. Summer is the time when I feel exhilarated and beyond happy, so of course right now I'm kicking the door down for spring to arrive. These last couple months have been hard for lots of reasons, big a big source of my anxiety lately is my job. For those of you who don't already know, I work at an assisted living center and loved it most of the time. In December, I was hired to a new position that came with a lot of stress and responsibility. Not something I consider myself unable to handle, but unless you've been there, you'd understand the pressure. I quickly became frustrated with my job and dreaded going into work. I worked under an RN's license, and from what I saw, I started questioning my decision to go into nursing. I decided that I wasn't enjoying my job like I should, so I quit. With this being the 1st of February I am now officially a part-time college student with only one job that isn't exactly inviting the income I need to pursue school. But I know that I enjoy this job--mostly because it satisfies my creative side. But now I am on the hunt for another job. I'll probably send resumes into local clinics and maybe two hospitals; you know, see how good my luck is. As of now, I'm thinking I want to go back to MATC like I did last summer and get my MA (Medical Assistant), and since I need that certification for most clinical jobs I don't know how well my chances will be until summer comes around and I can enroll. I'm just in a rut right now and I know that's part of being an adult and eventually everything will work out and I'll end up where I'm supposed be doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I just don't know how to get there. So if you have any advice I guess I would appreciate it:)
Anyways, I said I was really excited for February--some exciting things are happening this month! But I'm mostly excited just to have a month off from all the stress. I'm going to pick up some extra hours at the warehouse and just focus on school. But I decided that this month I really want to focus on giving myself extra attention. I want to do more things that make me happy and therefore make those around me happy, too. I want to spend time with my family, more time with my friends, and do things for myself, because that's important. I would encourage you to do the same--there's no better time!
So here's to 2016! I hope you bring many happy memories and clarity for those of us who need a little guidance. XOXO.

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2 comments:

  1. so sorry for all the stress! wish i had the best words of advice for u, but don't think i do... glad u r taking ME time and figuring things out, to me nothing is worse than spending tons of money for school, then changing ur mind on what u want to do, so take ur time and do it right! love u and think the world of ya! loves girly!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks T! You are the coolest aunt--come visit soon!

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